Tag Archive | Poetry

In an imperfect world…

Nov22

We can try as hard as we can
Read as many self-help books as possible
Attend workshops on relationships and communication…
But our world will still be a messy place
Conflict will not go away
Pain will not disappear
Anguish will still come our way

I’m not saying we should not try
All I’m saying is don’t expect perfection if you try
100% effort does not always result in an A+
Our world is imperfect
Even unjust
But we are resilient
We will survive

The image of a happy life being
A problem free life is for me no more
Problems are here to challenge us
Teach us, help us grow

Pain is unavoidable in life
Even those we love
We hurt sometimes
But we are resilient
We will survive

I’ll try to relish the joys in life
Live with the pain
Accept that our world
Is an imperfect place
And we are the imperfect inhabitants
Doing our best!

Lida Berghuis
November 22nd, 2012

Good byes

Nov13

Good byes are only for those who love with their eyes
Those who love with heart and soul, never say good bye*

Heart and soul can bridge the distance
A mile, a hundred miles, a thousand miles

Heart and soul communicate
Without words, see without eyes

Heart and soul keep memories alive for a long time
Heart and soul traverse the distance in the blink of an eye

In this nether world, we also love with our eyes
But these eyes for eternity will not be around
Heart and soul, however, won’t abandon us

Lida Berghuis
November 14th, 2012

*Rumi

The old fashioned way!

Oct31

 

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I take out my notebook and my pen
It’’s so last century
But what the heck!
My notebook is not out of battery
Or dependent on a server
My pen writes the right letters
And does not mistakingly auto-correct

Yes, I can’’t directly post it
On Facebook
But perhaps we post too often
Too much, too soon!

You can decide not to mail
A letter after some contemplation
The send button is not there
As a temptation!

Oh, yeah letter writing is also passé
We used to do it, but now we e-mail instead
My son was not sure where to put the
Sender’s address
And called the stamp a sticker the other day
And the letter he wrote
Was an assignment for school
He may not write another letter
Anytime soon!

Everything is digital
Fast and real-time
Breaking news is ordinary now
We can see what’’s happening
In any part of the world
For that we only need a cell-phone

But …While I wait for my IPad
To find the server
I will write and read the old fashioned way!

Lida Berghuis
Oct 30th, 2012

I’m home

Oct28

I’m home

I’m home and I feel surrounded by love
I’m home and I can lay my burden down
I’m home and I can recount my trials
I’m home and I thank the heavens above
I’m home and there is no room for pretense
I’m home and I can be myself

I come here tired and spent
I leave here feeling refreshed and alive
I come with a heavy heart
I leave with joy and delight

I come covered by the dust of the world
I leave free from it all
In our lives, hectic and rushed
This is a place of peace and calm

Your spirit is present in each room
It envelopes my weary soul
Refreshed and consoled I leave here today
Thankful for this piece of heaven on earth

Lida Berghuis
October 26th, 2012
At the Maxwell home in Montreal

Imposter

Oct20

It’s painful to smile
And cry inside
This pain I have felt
Many times

Shutting out others from my pain
Pretending to be someone I’m not

So easy to fool others it is
I can put on a smile anytime

I’d rather be myself
But don’t know how
My smile is my trademark after all

Yet I feel fake
I feel dishonest
un-genuine
As I keep up that radiant smile

They say how are you
Expecting “I’m fine”
How can I not oblige?
What do I say?
“I feel terrible”?
“I feel anxious”?
I feel like an imposter most times

When others don’t look
My smile fades again
No reason to pretend any longer
When others don’t look
I can be me
“The tired me”
“The scared me”
“The confused me”
The me who longs to reach out
But does not know how!

Drops of rain

Sep18

Shall I turn the page?
Leave sadness behind?
Keep a smile on my face for a while?

Sounds lovely
Should be doable
But I can’t forget what has been
A trying time

Drops of rain
Travel down the window
Each in a hurry to get down
Then another arrives in its place
Making a new path
As it drops

Some drops travel slower
Some faster
But they all eventually
Get down
Washing the dust off
The window
As they fall

The joy of writing has returned
Words cheer me up again
Writing a release, a pleasure again
I’m making my way back to me again
The ‘me’ that was temporarily misplaced
Hidden or lost

How does one carry on
When one knows
The road to recovery is long?

By the grace of God
Help of family and friends
Sheer will
Absence of choice!

It’s time to look behind
Sigh out loud
And look ahead

Challenges come
They try us
They do their job
And eventually
If we persevere
They move on

It’s time to inhale deeply
Exhale softly
Carry on
Focus on others
Move along

Lessons learned?
Perhaps
Endurance tested?
For sure!

Drops of rain fall one by one
Oblivious of what’s around them
Focusing on their mission
To get down!

September 19th, 2012

On suffering

Apr28

Do we need to suffer to grow?
I think so
Do we want to suffer?
I think not!

Does suffering lead to growth?
It can
What does that depend on?
On us!

Where does that growth come from?
From change
Change in the way we see things
Change in the way we act

How does that change come to be?
From reflection
And a desire to grow

Can suffering break us?
I think it can
Does it have to?
I think not

Is life about suffering?
I don’t think so
Is it about growth?
I’d say yes

Does suffering lead to humility?
I think so
Is there a way around it?
I think not

Can suffering be our friend?
I think so
It depends on us
And how we respond

Am I at peace with the idea of suffering?
I think so
Will I look for it?
I think not!

Lida Berghuis
April 28th, 2012

The D-bomb

Apr23

People drop the F-bomb
much more often than
the D-bomb!
Don’t you think?

Why is depression
This ten letter word
Treated with more disdain
More suspicion
More stigma
Than four letter words?

Could it be that because like the
C-word, cancer
We associate it with
A dark and dreary condition
That often doesn’t have a cure?
And even that is changing
Now-a-days…

Is it because
Depression conjures up
Images of crying for days on end?
Being in bed for
Hours at a time?
Images of hopelessness
Helplessness
And all the things we’d rather
Not think about?

It is because se associate
Depression with a weak will
A defect of some kind?

Is it because we call it
A mental illness
And that conjures up
Images of patients in a
Psychiatric ward
Dulled by medication
Isolated and unwanted
By the rest of us?

I think it’s all of the above
And some more

Perhaps it’s because once someone
Conquers depression and feels good
They rarely talk about it
And share their victory

Perhaps it’s because
We don’t hear the stories
Of beating the blues and the
Transformational changes that
Can occur while dealing
With the challenges it brings

Perhaps it’s because
It takes courage
To share
To be one of the first few
Who brake the silence
Drop the veil
And let others know
That depression
Is as treatable as any other thing
It’s not one’s fault
Not a sign of weakness
Not a terminal illness
Nor a tunnel of darkness
Without end

The conversation
Is starting though
And I’m happy to add my voice
To those who have seen the darkness
And made their way to the light

Lida Berghuis
April 15th, 2012

My part!

Apr14

 

I used to pray and hope for
A letter from God!
With clear instructions
In legible handwriting please!

I used to pray and
And wait for a miracle
Ones that would erase
My problems with ease!

What I failed to realize
Was that prayer was a means
Of empowering me to
Find ways to grow and change
Find new ways of doing things

I assumed that change would happen
On its own
By the grace of God
My role was somehow left out!

I had to learn that
Problem solving starts with me
Examining the way I thought
Acted and lived

I had to learn
That self knowledge
Would lead to understanding
Understanding to doing things differently
And that would lead to healing

Why I left out this crucial part
I don’’t know
Perhaps because it required effort
Perhaps because I didn’’t realize
That in my own hands lay my destiny

I had to learn that
Inner change happens slowly
There are no quick fixes
Nor short cuts
But slowly and over time
The process gathers momentum
And there is no stopping it

I had to learn that
Once I took the first hard step
And saw some success
Taking the second step
Would be easier
And soon I’’d be walking
With much less effort
On the path that leads to
Understanding and healing

I had to learn I couldn’’t
Do all this on my own
That I needed guides
I needed friends
I needed those who would
Support me on the way
To a new understanding

Now I still pray
But I know I also have my role to play

Lida Berghuis
April 14th, 2012

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Normal or real?

Apr5

image

“Normal is someone we don’’t know well”
Goes the quote

We all have a public persona
And a private one
The public one gravitates to the norm
The private one is free and flawed
“Normal” is what we show on the outside
Flawed and real what we keep inside

Deep inside
We are all imperfect and insecure
We all have fears and anxiety
We all make mistakes
We all feel shame

Our public persona
Smiles and posts happy status updates
Our public persona
Smiles in all the pictures

Deep inside
We all have cried
Felt lost and hurt
Fallen flat on our faces
Lived where confusion reigns

Sometimes we live in a fantasy world
Where everything is supposed
To go well all the time
Where success comes easily
Where mistakes are frowned upon
Where heartache is to be avoided
Where pain is to be run from

But the real world
Is messy and seems unfair
In the real world
Darkness and light exist together
In the real world
Mistakes can lead to growth
In the real world
Normal is what we see
And reality resides within

Lida Berghuis
April 5th, 2012