Tag Archive | recovery

Thankful

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Today, I’m thankful for feeling well

Being able to laugh again

Today, I’m thankful that my creativity is back

And I want to write again

Today, I’m thankful to have energy

To do what is needed

Today, I’m thankful to walk in the sun

Having left the shadows behind

Today, I’m thankful to feel calm again

To face the things that come my way

Today, I’m thankful to have my optimism back

Along with my sunny disposition

Today, I’m thankful to feel well again

Once more, I’ve conquered darkness

 

September 2nd, 2018

It will take a while

 

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It takes a while to build it up

When your sense of self has been torn down

It takes a while to feel confident again

When your confidence has been shattered

It takes a while to laugh again

When your laughter has been silenced

It takes a while to get moving

When you’ve been stopped in your tracks

It takes a while to accept what was

When that thing is unpleasant

It will happen

But it takes a while

 

August 24th, 2018

Changes

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Thankful to be feeling well again

Thankful to start teaching again

Everything has a season

And the season of sadness is over

 

It took a while

It was extremely hard sometimes 

I would lose hope

I’d get frustrated a lot 

I was unhappy to be in darkness again

I was tired of hanging in there

 

Summer came and summer left

My mood finally began to change

As suddenly as darkness came 

One day it began to leave again

 

Still haven’t left it behind

Still processing this time

But I’m working my way back to me

To the confident, optimistic me

 

It will take a while

That’s normal

I’ll keep writing till all the sadness is gone 

 

August 21st, 2018

Just normal please

I feel like I can breathe again
I can laugh easily again
I can be silly again
I can concentrate again

What a relief!
Most times we appreciate things
Once they are gone

A clear head
A brain that thinks like it should
Seems like a most normal thing
Living without anxiety
Seems ordinary
Feeling passion and enthusiasm
Seems like a given to us
But for me, they are not

And like those things there are
Many other things I can take
For granted after a while

But our normal selves are anything
But ordinary and normal
That normalness can be lost in an instant
During illness
During times of trials
During transitions in life

Then we will long for our normal
Just our ordinary, everyday selves
Nothing fancy
Merely the person we used to be
That self that seems like a distant memory
An unattainable state

And so, we keep longing for normal
Just normal

December 10th, 2017image

Drops of rain

Shall I turn the page?
Leave sadness behind?
Keep a smile on my face for a while?

Sounds lovely
Should be doable
But I can’t forget what has been
A trying time

Drops of rain
Travel down the window
Each in a hurry to get down
Then another arrives in its place
Making a new path
As it drops

Some drops travel slower
Some faster
But they all eventually
Get down
Washing the dust off
The window
As they fall

The joy of writing has returned
Words cheer me up again
Writing a release, a pleasure again
I’m making my way back to me again
The ‘me’ that was temporarily misplaced
Hidden or lost

How does one carry on
When one knows
The road to recovery is long?

By the grace of God
Help of family and friends
Sheer will
Absence of choice!

It’s time to look behind
Sigh out loud
And look ahead

Challenges come
They try us
They do their job
And eventually
If we persevere
They move on

It’s time to inhale deeply
Exhale softly
Carry on
Focus on others
Move along

Lessons learned?
Perhaps
Endurance tested?
For sure!

Drops of rain fall one by one
Oblivious of what’s around them
Focusing on their mission
To get down!

September 19th, 2012

I have been there

I have been there
Where you are
It’s probably hard to believe
But I have

I bet you thought
You were the only one
Who had discovered
This desolate place
This arid ground

I have been there
Not long ago
And when I was there
I was like you
I thought I was
The only one
To have found my way
To this strange
And frightful place

I have been there
Where you are
I understand the loneliness
The hopelessness
The powerlessness
The pain
And the sorrow
Of this almost inhabitable ground

Yet I persisted
Even when I thought
I couldn’t any more
Somehow I convinced myself
To carry on
Because the alternative
Was even worse

And I’m here
To sing my song
To let you know
That you will survive
You will finally find your way out
Of this land
This quagmire
This deep valley of misery
This arena of trials

I have been there
Where you are
And I hope
I can convince you
To persevere
To tolerate the pain
Of being lost

Because one day
The light will shine
And whether it’s through
The help of a friend
Or a loved one
Whether by new insight
Whether by the healing medicine
Offered you
Or steps you take
To find your way out
You will leave this dejected place
And you will bring with you
Some wisdom
An unexpected gift of insight

And you will learn
Not to hate that place
Because struggling and pain
Are part of life
And our teachers
Should we choose
To ponder the mysteries of life