A lady of leisure, how I feel now
After years of looking after my children
And family, I have time
Time to write
Time to contemplate
Time to start my own projects
And those previous years, had their place
What I gained from them, I’m grateful for
But now, I can reflect and write
To my heart’s content
A lady of leisure, who I am!
When I was in pain
All I wanted was to be listened to
To feel that someone saw and felt my pain
That they acknowledged my suffering
Without judging or giving advice
I didn’t need to be told what the silver lining was
Or how fortunate I was
Sometimes I just wanted to be held and consoled
Sometimes all I needed to hear was:
This must be so difficult for you
This would give me the strength to carry on
And this is what I have to remember
When someone else shares with me their pain
March 22nd, 2016
How can one endure pain and not complain?
How can one be treated unfairly and not show anger?
How can one be mistreated and maintain a positive attitude?
The answer alludes me
But I know it is possible
Because I have known such people
I’ve observed them
I’ve read about them
And wondered where their strength comes from
Why their hope does not fade?
Why in their lives, sorrow does not reign?
Someone said that no one can take away
One’s freedom of how one responds to difficult situations
It is the response that defines us, shapes us
It’s in realising that we have a choice in how we look at the situation
How we interpret it
How we react to it
To maintain hope
To have patience that is born of wisdom and faith
To be resigned to what can’t be changed
These are born of the nobility of man
That allows him to respond so heroically to injustice
March 21st, 2016
If we expect life to be a smooth ascent
We’ll be disappointed time after time
If we see challenges as part of life
We’ll be less frustrated and distraught
If we don’t accept wrinkles as part of getting older
We’ll be saddened each time we look in the mirror
If we see them as a natural phenomenon
We may stop noticing them
If we think things should go the way we hope and plan
We’re in for a big surprise
If we realise somethings are out of our hands
We’ll accept detours with an open heart
Life is supposed to be messy, I was told
Otherwise we would not grow
And if I accept that
I’ll see challenges as part of the plan
Sometimes I wonder how I’m friends with people
Who have such different lives from me
Where is the commonality?
Then I realize that underneath all the veneer
The different social roles that we have
The conditions we live in and
The experiences we’ve had
We all long for connection
Connection with someone who
Does not judge and understands
Someone you can talk to about anything
Someone with whom you can cry and laugh
And this connection is a soul connection
It’s based on something deep inside
It’s as if you are on the same wavelength
And if the other person is old or young
Wealthy or not, shares your religion or not
It matters not
In choosing my friends what I look for
Is kindness, compassion and an encouraging nature
Someone I can talk to about things that matter to both of us
We don’t have to agree on everything
We just need to respect one another’s point of view
We all want to be seen and heard
That’s the gift our friend gives us and
That’s what we give back in return
March 7th, 2016
It’s all about balance
This often illusive state
Balance between caring for others
And self care
Balance between work and play
Life has been teaching me how to creat
And maintain this balance
And my balance is different from yours
You may need six hours of sleep to be well rested
I may need eight or nine
You may be able to work full time and
Maintain a healthy family life
I may not
To create balance I need to know myself
Know my strengths and limitations
Life is not a one-size fits all
I have to respect my size
And it’s not a matter of good or bad
Productive or not
Successful or not
It’s about how I feel in my skin
How I like to live my life
Not comparing myself with others
My life is good when I feel fine
I keep learning each day
But I’ll try really hard
To remember what I’ve already learned
Sometimes, it takes a few times to get something
Sometimes I’ll make the same mistake again and again
But I’ve learned to be patient with myself
Some lessons take longer to master
And that’s all right
March 13th, 2016
Depression is a disconnection
Disconnection from the world
One’s passions
One’s friends
One’s agile mind
It’s a forced disconnection
Someone just suddenly pulled the plug
I grope in the dark to find the cord
But alas it’s too dark
I keep trying
I get frustrated
I keep searching
No result
It’s like a nightmare
Out of my control
My only hope, to wake up!
March 10th, 2016
For more poems on depression and healing please
refer to my book: Feeling Fortunate but Awful
A mother’s work is not glamorous
No need to dress up for work
No chit chat at the water cooler
No breakfast meetings or lunches out
A mother’s work is repetitive
What was washed before needs to be washed again
The same advice needs to be repeated
The same routine, each day
One never really gets a promotion
Even though the challenges always change
One is not materially compensated
Even though one works day after day
Sick days don’t exist
Holidays are more busy sometimes
The same errands and
The same activities day in day out
Can test one’s patience after a while
The work of the mother as educator
Is invaluable of course
Nurturing, loving, encouraging, consoling and more
But often that’s taken for granted
That’s after all what mothers should do
The creativity that goes into problem solving
On this job, is overlooked
Mothers are doing what mothers must do
A mother’s contribution to society
Is often not appreciated
Especially if she doesn’t work outside the home
But let’s consider what the world would be like
If mothers did not do what mothers do…
March 10th, 2016
Seeing oneness instead of otherness
Seeing kindness, joy and creativity
Instead of the colour of someone’s skin
Seeing the invisible part of us
Instead of the clothes our spirit wears
Otherness is created by us
It doesn’t have a basis in reality
We all come from Africa
No matter how we appear now
Otherness has divided us for too long
It’s time to take steps toward oneness
It’s time to look at someone’s qualities
Rather than their country of birth
It’s time to see with our inner eye
We all come from Africa
March 10th, 2016
The season of Spring cleaning has arrived
But to be honest, I don’t do much extra cleaning
Around the house at this time
I was thinking about spring cleaning my heart though
Washing the dross off my soul
And adorning it with beautiful virtues:
Kindness, gentleness, patience
Exuberance, enthusiasm and joy!
Seeing the good in everyone
Having a sin-covering eye
Speaking with kindness and love
Avoiding being critical
Holding the hand of one who hurts
Trying to cheer them up
This kind of Spring cleaning makes sense to me
I should actually do it all year around
March 8th, 2016
lida's musings 