Tag Archive | authenticity


white flower


What is beauty?
Beauty is in being authentic
Being truthful with ourselves and with others
Being sincere in our daily interactions

What is beauty?
It’s all the colors of the rainbow
It’s the diversity we see

What is beauty?
Beauty is joy
It’s a radiant smile

What’s beauty?
It’s a compassionate heart

Real beauty is invisible to the eye

Feb. 23rd, 2018


img_0343It’s winter
The trees have lost their leaves
Their branches stand naked
Nothing protects them from the glances
That are cast upon them

The nests built in the shadow of their leaves
In spring
Stand exposed

There is something sad about
The absence of the lush leaves
That decorate their branches
And give them body
In the summer time
But there is beauty
In their new found transparency

Their branches are extended
With self confidence
Nothing weights them down
At this point
They feel lighter
Even though they are exposed
No secrets
No hidden agenda

They are vulnerable though
Ice will cover their branches during
Freezing rain
Weigh them down and break them
They will feel the sharp jabs
Of hailstones more acutely
But there is always a price to pay
When bearing one’s soul

November 25th, 2016

photo credit:  Masoud Atrvash


Showing the real me!

The real me!

She was not afraid to show her face
At a time when showing her face was akin to a crime

But she was not afraid
She removed the veil and showed her face
Some were confused
Some were perturbed
Some were shocked!

But she was not afraid
She had the courage of her convictions
She knew who she was

I draw on her courage to show you the real me
To remove the mask of pretence
The mask of ‘acceptable’
The mask of ‘normal’

And I don’t think the real me
Will shock others so much
Because I’m not that unique
My experiences are my neighbours’ experiences
My friends’ experiences
Or perhaps yours

I’m not so unique
Any pain I have experienced
Has been experienced by others as well
Any challenge I’ve had
Has been the lot of others as well

She showed her face when showing her face
Was akin to a crime
All I’m doing is showing you the real me!

Lida Berghuis
December 18th, 2014


“Vulnerability is the birth place of love, creativity
joy, and belonging”

One has to risk rejection to find love
One has to be open to trying something new and untested
to be creative
One has to have known sorrow to know joy
One as to share one’s weaknesses to be welcomed
into an authentic relationship with someone else

It’s easy to show our happy, together,
confident, optimistic side
It takes courage to show our pain, sorrow,
insecurities, and doubts

It’s easy to play it safe, afraid of making a mistake
It takes courage to take a leap of faith

It’s easy to decide when the outcome is clear
It’s more difficult to accept the uncertainties of life

I used to want a letter from God
telling me which way to go and what to choose
I now know that growth comes from making the
best decision with the information I have
knowing that it may not lead me to the desired destination right away
but that eventually I’ll find my way

Life is not a straight line
It’s a jagged line
or perhaps it’s a meandering river
going to the right or the left sometimes
but all the way adjusting its course
to reach the ocean in time

And the way to accept this perceived imperfection
in our path in life is to realise
that in any case
we are worthy of love
and we will be loved!

Lida Berghuis
December 16th, 2014

*Brene Brown


We hesitate to show our flaws
We hesitate to ask for help
We want to appear strong!
But is that real?

We can’t be strong all the time
We can’t do everything on our own
What we think will make us look weak
Is what makes us seem normal

Normal is being weak sometimes
Normal is falling down
Normal is needing support
Normal is having flaws

Showing vulnerability
Requires trust
One must feel loved
And know that that love
Does not depend on
Appearing perfect or strong

Showing that we are fragile
That we break down at times
Builds bonds
Bonds of friendship and love
It allows others into our lives

Everyone has scars
And imperfections
It’s our choice to show them
Or not
But these imperfections make
Us look real
Put others at ease
And gives them a chance to be strong

This is how we can build authentic friendships
Ones that will stand the test of time!

Lida Berghuis
March 14th 2013

Normal or real?


“Normal is someone we don’t know well”
Goes the quote

We all have a public persona
And a private one
The public one gravitates to the norm
The private one is free and flawed
“Normal” is what we show on the outside
Flawed and real what we keep inside

Deep inside
We are all imperfect and insecure
We all have fears and anxiety
We all make mistakes
We all feel shame

Our public persona
Smiles and posts happy status updates
Our public persona
Smiles in all the pictures

Deep inside
We all have cried
Felt lost and hurt
Fallen flat on our faces
Lived where confusion reigns

Sometimes we live in a fantasy world
Where everything is supposed
To go well all the time
Where success comes easily
Where mistakes are frowned upon
Where heartache is to be avoided
Where pain is to be run from

But the real world
Is messy and seems unfair
In the real world
Darkness and light exist together
In the real world
Mistakes can lead to growth
In the real world
Normal is what we see
And reality resides within

Lida Berghuis
April 5th, 2012

Let yourself be seen!

“In order for connection to happen
You have to let yourself be seen
Be really seen”

With your strengths and weaknesses
With your beauty and ugliness
With your courage and your fear
With your smiles and your tears
With your joy and your sorrow
With your highs and your lows
With what you know and do not know
With what you feel and what you don’t

If this connection is to last
All these things will come to fore
Why hide them
Why pretend?

For an enduring connection
You need to be loved
Warts and all
You need to love yourself
Before all

Love yourself
Have compassion for yourself
Be content with where you are
While you forge ahead in life

Lida Berghuis
January 20th, 2011

*Brene Brown in the ‘Power of vulnerability’