Tag Archive | smile

The happiness police…

Jul27

The happiness police…

Here in Quebec we have the language police
On the look out for too much English
French they feel needs to be protected
Or English will rule the day

In Iran there is the ‘guidance’ police
Guidance re modesty
Guidance re how much make up is allowed
Guidance re how much hair can be visible under your hijab

Is it me or are most of these rules for women?
Why should men get a free pass?

Someone said we need a ‘happiness’ police
Someone who’d stop you if you looked despondent and sad
Someone who’d give you a hug to make you smile
Someone who’d ask you how your day was going so far

Someone who’d carry your groceries for you
Someone who’d help you find the address you’re looking for
Someone just smile at you so you would smile too!

I think our communities would be happier and
Healthier if we had the happiness police in charge!

Loneliness

Jan12

Isolation and loneliness
Like a cancer spreads
The effects are gradual and invisible at first
But eventually manifest themselves

Isolation and loneliness
Don’t seem so harmful at first
But over time they do damage
To our souls and hearts

Isolation and loneliness
Not how we are meant to live
Independence is over-rated sometimes

Contact and compassion what we need
What heals
A smile, a warm touch
A healing medicine

‘How are you doing, are you all right’
Shows we care, helps us connect
Sometimes this is all it takes
To rescue someone from the grip of awful thoughts
Sometimes this is all it takes
To give someone hope to go on

Isolation and loneliness, weakens and saddens
Contact and helpfulness, heals and gladdens!

Lida Berghuis
January 11th, 2015

Connection!

Oct12

We are super-connected
Yet, so disconnected at times
We have the technology
But to transform the world we live in
We need to add heart!
Because when hearts connect
There’’s nothing that can’’t be done!

We have the World Wide Web and the Cloud
We are connected to each other 24 hours a day
But the connection that we need
To change the world we live in
Is super low-tech!

This connection can be made with a smile
A shared moment of joy
It can be made with an eye contact
That acknowledges the other person

This connection is made by feeling the pain of someone who is in distress
Someone who needs a helping hand
And listening ear

For this connection, all one needs is love
A sense of belonging to the whole and
Being responsible for the welfare of all

So, as we get better connected technologically each day
Let’s not forget this most important connection

Lida Berghuis
October 12th, 2014

Inspired by:
Reimaging the world From scarcity to prosperity
Eliane Ubalijoro | TEDxConcordia

My laughter does not age!

Oct6

 

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Are you fearful of getting older?

Not if I’m learning my lessons as I go
Not if I’m contributing to other people’s joy
Not if I’m doing something useful!

Are you fearful of getting older?
Not if I can look at the world with wiser eyes
A more compassionate heart
A twinkle in my eyes

Are you afraid of getting older?
No, since my spirit does not age
My laughter does not get old
My smile is as young as ever!

Yes, my body may not heal as fast as before
But perhaps my spirit can heal faster
There are wrinkles here and there
But why look down on wrinkles
They are the sign of a life well-lived!

So, let’s not fear aging
Let’s celebrate a life well-lived!

Lida Berghuis
October 6th, 2014

The little voice I don’t listen to…

Sep2

I may have figured out my limits somewhat…
But sometimes I don’t read the signals my body and mind
Send me, correctly

The ‘I’m tired’ signal is ignored
The ‘I’m frustrated’ signal is dismissed
The ‘I’ve taken on too much’ signal is pushed away!

At these times
I forget that I’m not super-human
I forget that I can say No!
I forget that I can drop projects temporarily
I forget that I can ask for help
I forget that my energy rises and falls
And sometimes I can do more, and sometimes
I need to do less!

I get caught up in the ‘rat race’ of service
I think more is better
That I will manage somehow
That next week, I will be less tired
That soon, I will catch up on my sleep!
That if I keep smiling, I won’t cry!

I forget to advocate for myself
I forget I don’t have to please everyone
I forget it’s my responsibility to know my limits
And say ‘no’ when it has been reached!

I forget that I need a lot of down-time
Time to write
Time to reflect
Time to meditate
Time to relax!

I keep going despite fatigue
Despite the fact that I get a feeling that
I have taken on too much again!

I don’t listen to the voice that tells me
It’s too much…
You’re not getting enough rest!
You need to ask for help!
You need to communicate better!

… Until it’s too late!

Lida Berghuis
August 31st, 2014

Acting happy, feeling sad*

Apr13

A brilliant smile on my face
Only if I felt like that inside
Too hard to share my pain with others
I put on a happy front

Acting happy, feeling sad
Acting like everything is fine
What you see on the surface
Does not reflect what’s inside

Acting happy, feeling sad
Cannot share the turmoil within
Too much to explain
What would I say?
It’s easier just to smile

Acting happy, feeling sad
An actress in my own life
But the script was not written for me
I’m writing it as I go along

Acting happy, feeling sad
Feeling unauthentic and unreal
Tired of putting on a show
There is no joy in this smile!

Lida Berghuis

*This poem was written a while back when I felt down.
It can apply to other situations in which we hide
our true feelings from others.

Perking up!

Apr8

Perking up!

Perking up
Very slowly
Sunshine is returning to my life
The Winter was long and towards the end
Blue, the color of my mood
And gone was my smile

Energy left me
Laughter disappeared
I was not in a happy place

Sometimes hope returned
But the cold and dark days persisted
And my mood did not change

The glimmerings of spring are here now
Snow is melting
It’s warmer outside
My mood is finally changing color
It’s on its way to rosy and bright

April 8th 2014
Lida Berghuis

Pitter patter

Oct24

Sitting downstairs
I hear the pitter patter of little feet
Walking around

Pitter patter pitter patter
I must be quick
Pitter patter pitter patter
The morning is here

Pitter patter pitter patter
Let’s wake dad up
Pitter patter pitter patter
It’’s time to start

Pitter patter pitter patter
He comes down the stairs
Pitter patter pitter patter
Now, I can see his face

A bright little face
With a beautiful smile
That lights up the room
And warms my heart

The pitter patter
Has come to a stop
I ask for a hug
And his arms open wide

He envelopes me
In those little arms
He gives me a kiss
That melts my heart

These are the joys
Of having a child
These are the pleasures
Of being a mom!

Lida Berghuis
Sept. 18th, 2003

Imposter

Oct20

It’s painful to smile
And cry inside
This pain I have felt
Many times

Shutting out others from my pain
Pretending to be someone I’m not

So easy to fool others it is
I can put on a smile anytime

I’d rather be myself
But don’t know how
My smile is my trademark after all

Yet I feel fake
I feel dishonest
un-genuine
As I keep up that radiant smile

They say how are you
Expecting “I’m fine”
How can I not oblige?
What do I say?
“I feel terrible”?
“I feel anxious”?
I feel like an imposter most times

When others don’t look
My smile fades again
No reason to pretend any longer
When others don’t look
I can be me
“The tired me”
“The scared me”
“The confused me”
The me who longs to reach out
But does not know how!

Smile

Jan26

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Smile and world will smile at you
Open your arms and the world will receive you

Radiate good thoughts
Good will come your way
Be generous
You will be rewarded

The positive vibes you send out
Attract goodness no doubt
The warmth you impart
Will be your own reward

We don’’t give to receive
We give because it brings joy
Give generously
And happiness will be yours

There is always weakness
And darkness if you look for it
Why waste that energy
No need for it

The most flawed person
Has something that can be praised
Focus on that
Leave the rest!

January 5th, 2012
Lida Berghuis