My hands miss the paper I write on
My heart misses expressing its feelings and thoughts
Where has my creativity gone?
There is some colour in my life from time to time
But shades of grey dominate
I want to leave these dreary colours behind
And so I write!
I write to feel like me again
I write to feel free again
I write to feel joy again
I write to be me again!
Lida Berghuis
April 8th, 2015
“For sadness, we prescribe a friend”*
For despair, we prescribe a friend
A friend
One who listens with care
A friend
One who does not compare
A friend
One who is always there
For disappointments, we prescribe a friend
For crises in life, we prescribe a friend
A friend
One with open arms
A friend
With whom you can laugh and cry
A friend
One who loves you for who you are
For sorrow, we prescribe a friend
For heartache, we prescribe a friend
A friend
A solace in time of need
A friend
One who brings you cheer
A friend
All that you need!
*quote by Rumi”
The pizza dough instruction said
Cook at 450 degrees
I suggested 425!
Albert asked why?
Why do you question 450?
Don’t you think they gave this some thought?
Don’t you think they know what
They are talking about?
Yes, but I think 425 will do the job!
Why? How does this make sense?
Why should I make sense, said I!
There are lots of things that don’t make sense
Why should this one?
It doesn’t make sense when close friends
Move far away
It doesn’t make sense that some people
Throw away food while others starve!
It doesn’t make sense that we try to
Solve our problems with war!
That we create safety by having more guns!
It doesn’t make sense that girls are not treated right
They can’t get the education they want
They are sold and bought!
I know this is heavy stuff
But these things don’t make sense either
Why should I?
Feb. 1st, 2015
We charge our phone battery diligently
But sometimes we forget to recharge our own!
I guess the phone batter warns us
50%… 40%… 25%…
Whereas our mental and emotional battery
Does not have a gauge
Often we wait till it’s too late…
In absence of a gauge
And because we often don’t pay attention
To the signs of tiredness and fatigue
It’s best to recharge regularly, every day
And not wait
Sometimes we feel guilty
Paying attention to our own needs
It feels selfish
But if we don’t take care of ourselves and crash
No one will be better off
If we don’t take care of ourselves
We may feel resentful
And do things half-heartedly
Whereas when our batteries are full
What we do will be done whole heartedly
In a world that seems to be spinning
Faster and faster
Slowing down and paying attention to
What gives us energy
Is harder than before
I’ve learned these lessons the hard way
I’ve ran out of battery many times
But sometimes it takes a fall
To make us pay attention to the path we’re on!
“Life sucks!
What can you do?
Accept it and get on with it…”
This is not a pessimistic attitude
Or a defeatist one!
Our lives are not meant to be picture perfect
Everything they way it should be
Or the way we want it to be!
Our lives are a series of challenges
That when faced with grace
Can help us grow and be stronger
And better people
Life is not a smooth road
It’s a bumpy one
Some places are not paved at all
There are obstacles to manoeuvre around
Detours that pop up!
And sometimes we may reach the edge
Of a cliff and need to back up!
The easy road offers no benefits
Except for seeming ease and comfort
It’s the road full of pit falls and road blocks
That puts us to test and helps us develop new skills
So, yes, life sucks
But not in a bad way
It sucks
So we can learn, change, and grow
Lida Berghuis
January 15th, 2015
*something someone at the hairdressers said once
Isolation and loneliness
Like a cancer spreads
The effects are gradual and invisible at first
But eventually manifest themselves
Isolation and loneliness
Don’t seem so harmful at first
But over time they do damage
To our souls and hearts
Isolation and loneliness
Not how we are meant to live
Independence is over-rated sometimes
Contact and compassion what we need
What heals
A smile, a warm touch
A healing medicine
‘How are you doing, are you all right’
Shows we care, helps us connect
Sometimes this is all it takes
To rescue someone from the grip of awful thoughts
Sometimes this is all it takes
To give someone hope to go on
Isolation and loneliness, weakens and saddens
Contact and helpfulness, heals and gladdens!
Lida Berghuis
January 11th, 2015
Adversity is a blessing if we are able to look
With the eye of wisdom and see the gems hidden in it
Adversity is opportunity for growth
Adversity makes visible the invisible
Shows us what’s essential and
Guides us to surrender, humility, and acceptance
When faced with adversity
One can crumble and complain incessantly
Or one can decide to take an active part
In tackling the situation
Not running from it
Not hoping for miracles
Not blaming others and even God!
But resolving to see what can be learned
How best one can cope and to keep setting
Noble goals despite what may seem like
Unsurmountable limitations
Lida Berghuis
January 2nd, 2015
The real me!
She was not afraid to show her face
At a time when showing her face was akin to a crime
But she was not afraid
She removed the veil and showed her face
Some were confused
Some were perturbed
Some were shocked!
But she was not afraid
She had the courage of her convictions
She knew who she was
I draw on her courage to show you the real me
To remove the mask of pretence
The mask of ‘acceptable’
The mask of ‘normal’
And I don’t think the real me
Will shock others so much
Because I’m not that unique
My experiences are my neighbours’ experiences
My friends’ experiences
Or perhaps yours
I’m not so unique
Any pain I have experienced
Has been experienced by others as well
Any challenge I’ve had
Has been the lot of others as well
She showed her face when showing her face
Was akin to a crime
All I’m doing is showing you the real me!
Lida Berghuis
December 18th, 2014
“Vulnerability is the birth place of love, creativity
joy, and belonging”
One has to risk rejection to find love
One has to be open to trying something new and untested to be creative
One has to have known sorrow to know joy
One has to share one’s weaknesses to be welcomed into an authentic relationship
It’s easy to show our happy, together, confident, optimistic side
It takes courage to show our pain, sorrow, insecurities, and doubts
It’s easy to play it safe, afraid of making a mistake
It takes courage to take a leap of faith
It’s easy to decide when the outcome is clear
It’s more difficult to accept the uncertainties of life
I used to want a letter from God
telling me which way to go and what option to choose
I know now that growth comes from making the best decision with the information I have
Knowing that it may not lead me to the desired destination right away
But that eventually I’ll find my way
Life is not a straight line
It’s a jagged line
Or perhaps it’s a meandering river
Going to the right or left sometimes
But all the way adjusting its course to reach the ocean
And the way to accept this perceived imperfection in our path
Is to realize that in any case, we are worthy of love!
Lida Berghuis
December 16th, 2014
*Brene Brown
I see you
I hear you
I see your suffering
I feel your pain
Sometimes that’s all she needs to hear
She doesn’t want any solutions
She doesn’t need my ideas
She just wants to be heard
To be held
To be acknowledged
That’s what I would want
And that’s all she wants
Lida Berghuis
December 13th, 2014
lida's musings 