Tag Archive | writing

Am I stressed?

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Am I under constant stress due to my cancer treatment?

I’d say no

It’s been seven months since the diagnosis

The first few weeks very stressful

The sense of disbelief

Getting used to the idea or accepting it

All the what-ifs that go through your mind

And then accepting what’s to come

Initially, I thought I’d only need surgery and radiation

But then came the news of chemo

That was a tough pill to swallow

But we have no choice but to accept

The surprises life brings us

Acceptance brings us a certain level of peace

The first three months of chemo were tough

Especially because my mood was affected

Now, I’m back to my normal life

And so happy to be writing again

So, I’m not stressed right now

Just going through the various stages of treatment

Knowing that the prognosis is good

Feeling the love and support of my family and friends

And making the best of the situation that I’m in

January 31st, 2023

My calling

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Another cloudy day

The sun has abandoned us

It’s either cloudy

Or it snows

Or there is freezing rain

Our hearts year for sunshine

But my energy is back

And there is lots to do

From writing, to editing to publishing

To making videos and adding poetry to my website

It’s almost a part-time job

But there is no monetary compensation

No career perks

Similar to being a full-time mom

That’s how I’ve spend most of my life

Doing things that I find important and rewarding

But not earning a dime

I call Albert my benefactor

He has supported me all along

He says raising children is a most important job

And as for writing

I have no choice

I think it’s my calling in this life

January 21st, 2023

I miss me

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When I don’t write, I’m not me

Writing has become such a big part of me

When I don’t write something is wrong

When I feel good, I write quickly

Words flow

Ideas are there, no hesitation

The page is filled in a few minutes

And I’ve said my piece

When I don’t open my notebook

And if I do, words trickle down ever so slowly

I miss being me

January 4th, 2023

Being grateful is best

 

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At the coffee shop

Sitting in the sun

Watching normal people doing normal things

Chatting with friends

Having their croissants with coffee

Me, I’m feeling good relatively speaking

I’m at the coffee shop, aren’t I?

I wonder when I’ll be back to normal

Normal energy levels

Normal days 

It will be a while

So, I have to make the best of it for now

Who knows what kinds of issues

The people at the table next to me are dealing with

I could look very normal to them

But I know better myself

This is a process I have to go through 

One day at a time

I can’t have my eyes on the end

That’s too long from now

I’ve got to be my best self 

Whatever that is now

Do what I can

Rest when I can’t 

Accept things as they are

Be thankful for the treatment I’m getting

In a beautiful hospital

With competent specialists

It’s always best to be grateful

It leads to a better outcome 

 

October 28th, 2022

Nine days after first chemo treatment 

A poet?

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I don’t think of myself as a poet
A writer, perhaps
A recorder if my reality
One who writes to be consoled
To be understood
To understand
To explore
To share
To celebrate
To make known

I’ve always written
And I always will
Writing is part of my identity

And if what I write moves someone
Or brings them joy
If it has meaning for them
And makes them feel less alone
I feel blessed to be part of their world

June 29th 2022

Being 58

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58 is a good year!

And what is a good year?

A year when creativity thrives

A year when growth occurs

A year of joyful times and challenging times

A year of time spent with family and friends

A year of writing and bringing writing projects to fruition

A year of seeing my children living their lives as young adults

Finding their places in society

And serving their community

A year of travel

And seeing old friends from Iran

Another year of filling my journals

Writing poetry

And sharing them with my friends

The years go by one by one

And 58 will be a great year!

May 18th, 2022

Covid and I

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The worst part of Covid after the symptoms 

Which were actually tolerable

Was being stuck at home

I’m not a home body

I need to go out and be among people

I could not even go grocery shopping

We ordered groceries on line

I didn’t feel strong enough to go for walks as I usually do

Days were monotonous

Ibuprofen 

Oil of oregano

Cold FX

Teas

Oranges

Anything that would boost my immune system

Became my best friend

And yet, the virus has its own schedule

It can’t be rushed out

So, today I have come to the coffee shop

For some semblance of normalcy

To see people

Chit chat about the weather 

Write

And go into my bubble of solitude and contemplation

So that a change of scenery 

Can make me forget the fatigue I experienced

And the long hours I slept

Et voila!

I do feel better now!

April 25th, 2022

Back again

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I’m at one of my favourite places, the coffee shop

Where I read and write and have time to myself

The place where I recharge my batteries

Things are not the same as before

We still wear masks

We still sanitize 

And now we show our covid passports

But we can have coffee with friends now

The conversation is lively at the tables next to me

Whereas a few months ago I may be one of the two people staying for coffee

Everyone seemed to take coffee to go

I don’t come to the coffee shop as often as before though

Albert has been working from home, and we have our morning coffee together

I try to write at home

But there are always distractions

The coffee shop allows me to focus 

And stay in my own world as long as I need

No one interrupts me

The door bell does not ring

No one asks me questions and derail the train of my thought

I need this solitude to write

I’m grateful for another visit to the coffee shop 

November 3rd, 2021

Continue reading

Sometimes

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Sometimes it’s good to have no plans

Sit and let your thoughts play in the playground of your mind

No place to be

No appointments to keep

Nothing to cross off your to-do list

Just sit and stare

Or in my case, write 

With with no agenda or plan

Write as a kind of meditation

With no goal in mind

These times are rare but essential

Our souls need maintenance too

If we fill up every hour of our day

We may burn out 

Or feel really tired

We need time to focus on positive thoughts

To look for beauty in nature or art

Perhaps create something just because

Take a break from the rat-race of life and

Breathe deeply

And after a while, when we are ready

Tackle the things that need to be done

April 25th, 2021

Reaching out

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The desire to communicate has always been strong in me

Communicating what I think and feel

Things that are not that unique

Things that are relatable 

Things others may have experienced as well

Or putting things in new ways

Sharing something they might not have paid attention to

The desire to reach out has always been strong

The need to create links with others 

Connect the hearts

Create a sense of unity 

Create bonds with shared realities

Celebrate life 

Reflect on the sad times

And share the lessons learned

The desire to reach out has always been strong

April 4th, 2021