Taking the edge off

Oct6

 

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When I see the pain on her face
I want to take an eraser and erase it

When I see the pain on her face
I want to come up with magical words
That will wash the pain away

When I see the pain on her face
My heart aches as well

My first instinct is to try to stop her pain
But sometimes all I need to do
Is to take the edge off the pain

A hug, an understanding glance
A sympathetic response
An acknowledgement of the ‘hurt’
Is all that’s needed

No, it won’t take the pain away
But it will give her a respite
From the severity of it

It will tell her that she’s not alone
That there is someone who understands her

It will tell her that someone is aware of
The turmoil she’s in

It also sends her the message that
She’s strong enough to endure the distress
That has come her way

No, I can’t make the pain go away
But my empathy can make a huge difference
In making the situation more bearable
And in taking the edge off the pain

Lida Berghuis
October 6th, 2015

A true friend

Oct4

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A friend is someone I can call on day or night
And she will have time for me

A friend is someone who cheers me on when
Things get tough

A friend is someone whose hug gives me energy
To go on

A friend is essential in life
She’ll be my life boat when the waters get rough
She’ll be my shelter when rain pours down
She won’t make my problems go away
But she makes life bearable until I get back
To my place of calm

She won’t make the hurts of the past disappear
But her understanding heart will take the edge off
Those jagged parts of my life

A friend is someone who encourages me to
Fight my own battles, but is there to support me
As I struggle and fight

A true friend is as precious as the air I breathe
More valuable than riches
The sun in my sky!

Lida Berghuis
October 4th, 2015

nothing changes

Oct1

Days go by and nothing changes

The same room
The same people
The same food
The same isolation
The same restrictions

The same injustice
The same false accusations
The same unfair treatment

And as there is no change
Days slow to a crawl
The world loses its colour
And it takes a mighty effort
To see the cup as half full
Or by now, a quarter full!

Patience, immense patience is required
Faith, an unshakable faith is needed
Love, a boundless love is called for

Only a noble soul can be subjected
To such unfair treatment and not complain

Only a noble soul can be thankful for having
Been chosen to suffer in the path of love
For his Beloved

Only a noble soul can stay strong and
Not lose heart

The same walls
The same colourless surroundings
The same deprivations

The same amazing courage!
The same reliance on God!
The same great sacrifice!

Lida Berghuis
October 1st, 2015
For the Yaran

Confused

Sep29

I don’t know what’s real anymore!
All these changes in one day
Are not easy to handle

First you change the jam
From strawberry to mixed berry
Now I don’t know what taste to expect
When I make my sandwich with peanut butter and jam

Then you tell me my usual cereal bowl is not clean
And I have to use a different kind
The bowl makes a difference you know…

And finally when I go to brush my teeth at night
I find a new toothpaste
Another new taste in my mouth!

Mom, all these changes have confused me today
My familiar things aren’t there
You know I’m pretty routine oriented
I do everything in the same order each day
And leave the house at exactly the same time
No surprises, no deviations from normal!

So, please don’t change things on me like that
And if you do, please make one change a day
And warn me in advance!

September 29th, 2015

Hiding pain

Sep22

Why do we hide our pain?
Don’t we realize everyone
Experiences hardship and suffering?
Why do we only share our success
And not the challenges we had to overcome?

Why is it difficult to share these things
Things that make us feel vulnerable
Things that reveal who we are?

It takes strength to show vulnerability!
It’s easy to smile and pretend everything
Is fine and it always has been
It takes courage to admit to hardships that
We have experienced
Talking about challenges we’ve had is hard

It’s easy to share what’s on the surface
It’s not easy to reveal what is in the deep
Recesses of our heart
That’s why many of us hide our pain
Keep those emotions deep inside

September 22nd, 2015

The final analysis

Sep10

Sometimes emotions are so overwhelming
I don’t know what to feel
Should I be sad?
Should I be shocked?
Should I be astonished?

We put our faith in our fellow man
But so many times someone betrays that trust
And shatters the image we had built in our head

Then we have to readjust our understanding of reality
Perhaps we become jaded
Perhaps we become angry and frustrated
Perhaps we question the existence of justice and hope

But this state is not a healthy one
Hope is essential
Trust is essential
Faith that goodness exists is essential

Of course the hurt feelings will stay for a while
After all, we are not machines

All we can do is stay positive
Surround ourselves with good friends
And keep doing things that are worthwhile

Everything else is bound to work out
Because there is justice in the world
And even though some people try their best
To obliterate it, they won’t succeed

Justice will prevail
And light will overcome darkness
In the final analysis!

Lida Berghuis
September 9th, 2015

Change of plan

Sep7

I had it all planned out
After agonizing search and contemplation
I had settled on a path…
I knew what I was going to do…
I had figured it out…

And then suddenly
Out of nowhere, it happened!
The situation changed
All my plans went out the window
And the door closed in my face

Why?
Why now?
Why this change?

First there was shock and disbelief
There was anger and confusion
My plans, the ones I had ben working on
For so long, had to change

I spent a lot of time in the valley of
Disbelief and shock
Not knowing how to get out

There must be something good
In this new situation that has come my way, I thought
But that thing was hard to find

Yet, gradually, unbeknownst to me
Things were falling into place
Another door had opened and I was
Walking through it unconsciously

It took me a long time to become
Aware of this new path
This new arena I had entered
But overtime I began to see it
I began to understand the wisdom
Of what had happened
A door had closed, but another door
Had opened

Now, I do make plans
But I stay open to what comes my way…

Lida Berghuis
September 7th, 2015

unpaved road

Sep6

Imagine driving on a road and coming to an unpaved section
There is dust, the road is not smooth, and you slow down

There are two options at this point
Either to keep going and put up with the difficulties of the unpaved road
Or to back track a bit and find an alternate paved route

The second option requires effort
Requires searching for a new way
Even recognizing that there is an alternative

The difficulties of life are like unpaved roads
They are an invitation to look at other options
Other ways of thought
Other behaviour
In other words, growth…

But it’s up to us to accept the invitation or not
We also have the choice to continue on the gravel road
And suffer the consequences and complain
About the state of affairs and the unfairness of the situation
All the time not realizing it’s not the situation that
Has to change, it’s us!

Lida Berghuis
September 4th, 2015

Peace of mind

Sep4

If we see someone smiling
It doesn’t mean they have no challenges in life
We have gained wisdom if we can smile
Despite the difficulties of life

I used to wonder how is it possible to be happy
Despite the troubles of life
Then I read: ” Peace of mind is the result of
Not paying attention to challenges that are not
worth thinking about”

So, the problem need not go away
My attitude has to change
The importance I give it has to change
My focus should be on positive things
That way, my problems don’t have power over me

I can complain or I can be content
I can look at the glass as half full or half empty
I can put my focus on things that are going well or not
I can be thankful for the blessings I have or not
I can be optimistic that problems can be resolved or not
I can resign myself to situations I can’t change or not
I can try to learn from the difficult experiences of life or not
And finally, I can create my own peace of mind or not!

Lida Berghuis
September 4th, 2015

Building roads on clouds

Sep1

Generally I like the blue sky
With lots of sun to warm my body and soul
But clouds do come and rain is necessary
To sustain life
Rain also brings the rainbow out

What if instead of sadness at the sight of clouds
I build roads on them and use those roads to
Get to most interesting places

They say if life gives you lemon, make lemonade
So, if life brings gray rainclouds I’ll build roads on them
Roads built from lessons learned
And wisdom gathered so far

And when the sky rains tears of sorrow
I’ll climb the raindrops until I reach the top
Of the clouds and take a look around
Beyond the clouds, there is only sun
The hard work is the climb

But life has provided me with some training
In climbing and building roads so far…
Instead if allowing clouds to bring me down
I’ll climb the rain, and look beyond the clouds
Then build roads and carry on…

Lida Berghuis
September 1st, 2015