It’s early in the morning
It’s pitch black outside
The rest of the household is sleeping
But I’m wide awake
I pick up my phone
To see what my friends are up to
Their days have already started
They are awake
I talk to my friends in Europe
I talk to my friends in Iran
We talk about history
We talk about art
In this part of the world
My friends are still sleeping
But with the magic of technology
I’m in conversation with those who are not
October 26th, 2019
Chit chat
But interesting chit chat
Consequential chit chat
Stimulating chit chat
We talk about art
We talk about books
We talk about projects
We talk about what’s going on in our lives
We talk about the deeper questions we have
We share with each other our goals
Our dreams
Our concerns
We share with each other
Our present, future and past
Lively conversations
Ones which leave me heard and understood
Ones that guide me and help me develop my plans
These are the kind of conversations
I have with my dear friend, Elaheh
They are not just any kind of chit chat
April 24th, 2019
I travel to meet people who are living a different life from mine
I enter their lives for a short time and having exchanged thoughts, ideas and feelings, I depart
Sometimes it will be years before I see the same people again
Sometimes I’ll never see them at all
It’s a short intense relationship
A connection of the hearts
And the fact that I won’t be with these friends for a while, seems not to matter
I don’t know why!
July 14, 2017
Amsterdam
Conversation
Mommy, what happens when we die?
Death seems sad, it looks like we’re gone
And nothing remains
But our soul never dies…
Mommy, what is a ‘soul’?
your soul is your beautiful smile
Your inquisitive nature
Your kind heart
Your excitement and creativity
when you build LEGO cars…
Your sadness when your friend is down
Your curiosity to figure things out
All these questions you are asking
Are questions your soul wants to find out about!
But Mommy, then my soul is me!
Exactly!
But when I die I can’t see and play
You are right
Your body will no longer be there
But your soul will see in a different way
Will sense things in a new way
You will still recognize your family and friends
You can still grow and develop further
But Mommy, there is no LEGO there
What will I do
You told me before our soul is eternal
That seems like a long long time
Without toys to keep me occupied
Your soul will have other things to do
Things we don’t understand now
I promise you you won’t get bored
Yes, eternity is a long time…
So, I’ll see you when I get there
Of course my dear
I’ll wait impatiently for you
And we can be together always
That sounds good…
It’s time to sleep my dear
And dream good dreams
I’ll see you in the morning
Give you a big hug and then
You can tell me about your dreams!
Lida Berghuis
July 5th, 2015
I’m an extrovert
That I know for sure!
For me, being in someone’s company
And conversation go hand in hand
Sitting side by side in silence is almost
Impolite in my book!
It means I don’t want to talk to you
Which means I don’t like you or
I’m angry with you!
But an introvert is OK with silence
Ok with thinking things through when in someone’s company
Needs to day dream more than needs to talk
Has to have a really good reason to talk!
When an introvert is upset
They tend to not want to share what is bothering them
Which makes me confused since I don’t know how to help
And plus, why don’t they want to share what’s going on?
Wouldn’t that make them feel better?
I feel shut out!
I’ve come to learn that
An introvert needs lots of space
Lots of alone time
And problem solving is not a group activity for them
It can be done in solitude most of the time!
And now the hamster ball!
An introvert, I’ve come to know
Has a personal space that can’t be breached
They tend to live in a hamster ball
Be careful when you approach them
Don’t go sit next to them
Let them come sit next to you when it’s time
An introvert finds big social groups draining
They can only take so much company
Then the need to go back to a quiet, comfortable, known place
To recharge!
That’s really hard to understand for me
Because I get energy from being with people
I love small groups, big groups, groups of any kind
I come alive in the company of people
When surrounded by people
I’m in my element
I am where I belong!
I do need down time
Time for me and my thoughts
But an hour or two a day will do
It need not be very long
Understanding an introvert
Is like understanding someone from another culture
Misunderstandings can happen
Flexibility is needed
As well as an open mind and open heart!
But we are all people in the end
There is nothing a little communication
Some understanding
And genuine love cannot resolve!
Lida Berghuis
October 18th, 2014
What is it about drinking tea that is so soothing?
Especially when drunk in the company of a friend?
Is it the aroma of a lovely tea chosen with care?
Is it the warmth of tea felt all inside as one drinks it?
Is it the conversation that one can’t rush?
All of the above perhaps and much more!
Tea brings people together in a beautiful way
It’s a binding agent!
It communicates love!
It says I have time to make you some tea and
Sit and drink it with you as we chat!
It means I’m giving you attention
I’m happy to serve you
For all these things, offering someone tea
Is one of the loveliest things one can do!
Also, this tradition runs in my veins as a Persian girl
Offering tea, one of the first things one does when friends come over
It’s a warm welcome, a warm hug in liquid form!
Lida Berghuis
July 4th, 2014
Tea room in Hudson!
My favourite things tend to be simple and free
A walk by the water in the spring sun
With a friend or a loved one
Writing my poems in a lovely place
Listening to music of all kinds
Conversations over tea
Spending time in nature
Reading
Aside from these things
What I love to do is to get to know
People of various cultures and travel
Some of this can be done right were I live
The world has come here
Not need to go searching
But traveling is fun and enlightening as well
Being outside one’s comfort zone
Being exposed to the old and new
Seeing things from another point of view!
Our world, so colourful and diverse
So many places one can go
So many cultures to get to know
Traveling does require means
But it doesn’t have to be impossibly expensive
This will be part of my dream in years to come
Traveling, meeting people and delving into
Other cultures and ways of thought
One more thing on my list
Is laughing out loud
At a joke
A gesture
A story
Or anything at all!
Laughter relaxing
Laughter Devine
This does not cost a thing
Only good company
Someone witty and bright
I’m sure I have other favourite things
But for now, I’ll keep it to this list!
Lida Berghuis
June 23rd, 2014
Talking heart to heart!
Listening, really listening to someone else!
We don’t do it often enough
Small talk takes up a lot of our time
Real concerns and worries
Are buried deep inside
Then once in a while
We open our heart to someone else
And talk about what really matters
That requires trust
And being able to be vulnerable
Letting our guard down
It seems it’s hard to be our real selves most of the time
Instead we hide behind a beautiful smiling facade
Instead we put on the “All is OK” mask
Instead we bury what really matters deep down
But then there are those rare moments of honesty
Of being our authentic selves
When pretense disappears
When we speak from the heart
When we feel in close connection with another soul
The barriers having come down
Those moments are precious
Those are the conversations that heal us
Change us, and make us feel really alive!
Lida Berghuis
October 9th, 2013
lida's musings 