Tag Archive | suffering

Collage

Collage

Can’t pretend nothing happened
Can’t pretend it was easy
Can’t try to sweep it under the carpet
Can’t let it go without addressing it

And what was it this time?
Why again?
Why am I so fragile?

It was a marathon
A test of endurance
Putting one foot in front of the other
When pain, sorrow and anxiety
Was the order of the day

Everyone told me I would be fine
But in the meantime
I had to go through what seemed like
Unbearable times

I know I’m not the only one who suffers
I know I’m not unique
But I have to acknowledge what was
I have to come to terms with it
Understand it
Or at least be at peace with it

As I celebrate the return of light
I have to revisit the past
Arrange and rearrange the pieces
Until I’m satisfied
Until it’s ready to be a part of the collage of my life

‘Oriental’

It touches me somewhere deep within
It reminds me of the sorrows I’ve experienced

It lets me know it’s OK to suffer, we all do
It comforts me
It wraps its arms around me and tells me things will be fine
It reveals the beauty of the human spirit
It reminds me of how fragile we are

*This poem was response to a beautiful piece of music
called ‘oriental’ by Entique Granados

Another note to self…

If you’re tired and feel uninspired
Let it be…

If you’d like to see the sun but
It’s hiding behind the clouds
Let it be…

If you didn’t get something you wanted
Let it be…

Fighting what is, only brings one further down
Accepting what is, brings some calm

And always remember
Things will look up soon
Your energy will return
The sun will shine
Inspiration will visit soon

Contentment is the key
Doing the best with the situation we’re in
You never know what lessons
Are taught by sorrow and pain

If nothing else
It will increase your compassion
For others who are suffering as well
And remind you to help those in need
When the sun shines again

Each day be sure to count your blessings too
You can take so much for granted
And often don’t know what you have
Until it’s not there

Lida Berghuis
December 11th, 2013

Mistakes?

Life is full of ups and downs
The road is never smooth
Detours lurk here and there
Unpaved roads everywhere

I used to think that for some
The road was smooth most of the time
That is was my road that was so hard

I used to think if someone seemed happy on the outside
They were happy all the time

I used to think that my suffering was unique to me
My struggles only mine
I used to wonder why me
Why now…

Now I know all the obstacles were blessings in disguise
Now I know that there is no such thing as a smooth road in life

I used to think there is only one way to do things right
I used to feel paralyzed at a fork in life
What if I made a mistake?
What if I chose the wrong way?

Now I know all I needed to do was to make a start
There are many roads that lead to the same place
And sometimes we need to go the wrong way to find the right one!

I used to think
What if I make a mistake?
What a giant waste of time
But now I know that mistakes are essential parts of life

I used to think I knew what’s best for me
That I was usually right
But I now know that I’m here to learn with an open mind

Lida Berghuis
November 14th, 2013

Beauty revealed!

Beauty revealed!

The purpose of art if any needs to be stated
Is to bring beauty into our world
Or to reveal the beauty that exists!

Beauty inspires
Beauty heals
Beauty eases the suffering
That is inevitable
In life

Beauty soothes the soul
And calms the heart

Beauty elevates and
Bestows joy

Beauty vivifies and
Energizes

Beauty makes hope blossom!

Lida Berghuis
May 6th 2013

Sadness is the paint!*

The trials and sufferings of life are the medium
The canvas, what we must find to reveal the beauty
That can come from the trials of life

The paint is not enough
Sadness does not translate by itself
Into a work of art
The canvas, what we much search for
There is work to be done
Habits to let go of
New understanding to emerge
Virtues to be developed
Wisdom to be gained

Then we will realize
The gifts sadness has brought
The paint it has provided us with
And we can use this gift
To make a beautiful piece of art!

The trials, the paint
Our understanding, the canvas
The work of art a testimony to our growth!

Lida Berghuis
March 27th, 2013

*Mark Nepo, The book of awakening

Lessons taught by pain!

I always knew humility was not my forte!
There were times I felt very self righteous
I thought I had the answer to many questions in life
I knew I didn’t know everything
But I thought I knew a lot!

The confidence I felt
Came from not having lived long enough
To experience real pain and real suffering in life

I had not fallen hard yet
Unable to get up
I had not been brought to my knees by the trials of life

I had not been thrown into confusion
And questioned the fairness of life

I had not come to the point of questioning the point of life
Considering all the suffering it entailed

But life has a way of showing us how small we are
How mistaken we can be
How easy it is to break and lose faith
How hard it can be to get up again!

And perhaps that’s good
Because these are lessons
That can’t be learned the easy way
These are lessons
That require the sobering effects of pain!

Lida Berghuis
March 19th, 2013

I thought I could not!

I thought I could not
But I did!
I thought I would crumble and fall
but I did not!
I thought joy was gone forever
But it returned!
I thought the night would never end
But morning came!

I thought all hope was lost
And the reason to live
Had become hard to find
I thought this time was different
And I would not survive

I thought I had come to the end of my rope and could not take another step
I thought life was unfair
And I’d suffered enough

I thought I had reached my
Threshold of pain
And continuing would only
Bring more of the same

But despite all that
Hope gradually returned
Suffering eased
And I smiled again!

Lida Berghuis
February 20th, 2013

Imposter

It’s painful to smile
And cry inside
This pain I have felt
Many times

Shutting out others from my pain
Pretending to be someone I’m not

So easy to fool others it is
I can put on a smile anytime

I’d rather be myself
But don’t know how
My smile is my trademark after all

Yet I feel fake
I feel dishonest
un-genuine
As I keep up that radiant smile

They say how are you
Expecting “I’m fine”
How can I not oblige?
What do I say?
“I feel terrible”?
“I feel anxious”?
I feel like an imposter most times

When others don’t look
My smile fades again
No reason to pretend any longer
When others don’t look
I can be me
“The tired me”
“The scared me”
“The confused me”
The me who longs to reach out
But does not know how!

On suffering

Do we need to suffer to grow?
I think so
Do we want to suffer?
I think not!

Does suffering lead to growth?
It can
What does that depend on?
On us!

Where does that growth come from?
From change
Change in the way we see things
Change in the way we act

How does that change come to be?
From reflection
And a desire to grow

Can suffering break us?
I think it can
Does it have to?
I think not

Is life about suffering?
I don’t think so
Is it about growth?
I’d say yes

Does suffering lead to humility?
I think so
Is there a way around it?
I think not

Can suffering be our friend?
I think so
It depends on us
And how we respond

Am I at peace with the idea of suffering?
I think so
Will I look for it?
I think not!

Lida Berghuis
April 28th, 2012