Tag Archive | pain

Lessons learned

Dec4

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Some things in life we learn from our parents

Other things we learn through experience 

Here are a few things that I’ve learned 

 

That we can’t avoid pain in life

There is a place for suffering in our lives

That how we respond to painful situations

Is in our own hands

And that’s what will make the difference

 

That it’s OK to make mistakes

Making mistakes is part of life

And not something to be afraid of

Mistakes should be learning opportunities

Not to be dreaded and feared

 

That self care is important 

It’s as important as being selfless

Without self care we can’t care for others

Without self care we become resentful

Without self care we can crash and burn

 

That it’s important to nurture our creativity

That art counts, poetry counts

Art can be a solace in our lives

Creativity a way to unwind

That art brings beauty into our lives

Helps us heal

Helps us shine

 

December 3rd, 2018

Storm

Mar23

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There are times in our lives
That the intensity of our emotions
Overwhelms us
We feel deeply
We yearn passionately
We hurt intensely
We miss others badly

These powerful emotions
Sometimes bring us to our knees
We want to get out of the whirlwind
But we can’t
We feel the same feeling over and over
And it hurts

And at the same time
These are times that we feel most alive

The waves created by our emotions
Keep crashing against the cliff of our spirit
But in the end
Our spirit makes it through
It survives another storm
And arrives at a place of calm

March 23rd, 2018

Intertwined

Mar16

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Painful experiences lead to beautiful insight
A painful birth to a most beautiful child

In our world pain and beauty are intertwined

Beauty can be painful
Can wrench the heart
Beauty can cause us pain and trauma

Beauty and pain are intertwined

March 11th, 2018

Injured heart

Jan16

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What do I do when my heart is injured?

Do I put a bandaid on it to stop the bleeding?
What if the bleeding won’t stop and the band aid
Is not big enough?
Do I tie a bandage around my heart, tight
Then walk around with a bandaged heart for a while?

And what will I do to prevent further hurt and injury?
Do I encase my heart in a hard shell
So it stays safe from the next cut or breakage?

What should I do when my heart gets injured?

January 16th, 2018

Bitter medicine

Aug24

Sometimes we see pain as an anomaly
As something that gets in the way of our ‘happiness’
Or we see periods of pain as lost time
As a detour on the way we were headed

We don’t want to be in pain
Or see others in pain
I think that’s normal of course
But pain seems to be unavoidable in this life
And even necessary for our growth

Pain, like a violent force
Shatters the ego
Our image of ourselves
As in control and self sufficient
Breaks down
Sometimes we glue the broken pieces together
Only for it to break one more time.

Pain is a teacher as well
It helps us learn to reach out to friends
To trust in them
Pain shows us we need each other in our lives

Pain helps us better understand the suffering of others
The depth of their despair
It causes us to try to find a way to help
Those in distress

We were created to endure pain
That’s the mechanism by which we grow
Some soul searching is required of course
We need to play our role in this growth

Like bitter medicine
Pain has good results
And in any case
There is no way around it
In our lives

August 22nd, 2016

Easier said than done

Aug11

Emotional upheavals come our way
There is no way to avoid them
Then we have to put long term serenity
Over short term happiness

This is a difficult proposition
Status quo and temporary joy
Have great allure

The human spirit has to rise to the occasion
Flex its muscles
And accept the pain

Of course, all of this is easier
Said than done
August 11th, 2016

All I needed

Mar22

When I was in pain
All I wanted was to be listened to
To feel that someone saw and felt my pain
That they acknowledged my suffering
Without judging or giving advice
I didn’t need to be told what the silver lining was
Or how fortunate I was

Sometimes I just wanted to be held and consoled
Sometimes all I needed to hear was:
This must be so difficult for you
This would give me the strength to carry on

And this is what I have to remember
When someone else shares with me their pain

 

March 22nd, 2016

Nobility

Mar21

How can one endure pain and not complain?
How can one be treated unfairly and not show anger?
How can one be mistreated and maintain a positive attitude?

The answer alludes me
But I know it is possible
Because I have known such people
I’ve observed them
I’ve read about them
And wondered where their strength comes from
Why their hope does not fade?
Why in their lives, sorrow does not reign?

Someone said that no one can take away
One’s freedom of how one responds to difficult situations
It is the response that defines us, shapes us

It’s in realising that we have a choice in how we look at the situation
How we interpret it
How we react to it

To maintain hope
To have patience that is born of wisdom and faith
To be resigned to what can’t be changed
These are born of the nobility of man
That allows him to respond so heroically to injustice
March 21st, 2016

Taking the edge off

Oct6

 

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When I see the pain on her face
I want to take an eraser and erase it

When I see the pain on her face
I want to come up with magical words
That will wash the pain away

When I see the pain on her face
My heart aches as well

My first instinct is to try to stop her pain
But sometimes all I need to do
Is to take the edge off the pain

A hug, an understanding glance
A sympathetic response
An acknowledgement of the ‘hurt’
Is all that’s needed

No, it won’t take the pain away
But it will give her a respite
From the severity of it

It will tell her that she’s not alone
That there is someone who understands her

It will tell her that someone is aware of
The turmoil she’s in

It also sends her the message that
She’s strong enough to endure the distress
That has come her way

No, I can’t make the pain go away
But my empathy can make a huge difference
In making the situation more bearable
And in taking the edge off the pain

Lida Berghuis
October 6th, 2015

Hiding pain

Sep22

Why do we hide our pain?
Don’t we realize everyone
Experiences hardship and suffering?
Why do we only share our success
And not the challenges we had to overcome?

Why is it difficult to share these things
Things that make us feel vulnerable
Things that reveal who we are?

It takes strength to show vulnerability!
It’s easy to smile and pretend everything
Is fine and it always has been
It takes courage to admit to hardships that
We have experienced
Talking about challenges we’ve had is hard

It’s easy to share what’s on the surface
It’s not easy to reveal what is in the deep
Recesses of our heart
That’s why many of us hide our pain
Keep those emotions deep inside

September 22nd, 2015