Tag Archive | suffering

Imposter

Oct20

It’s painful to smile
And cry inside
This pain I have felt
Many times

Shutting out others from my pain
Pretending to be someone I’m not

So easy to fool others it is
I can put on a smile anytime

I’d rather be myself
But don’t know how
My smile is my trademark after all

Yet I feel fake
I feel dishonest
un-genuine
As I keep up that radiant smile

They say how are you
Expecting “I’m fine”
How can I not oblige?
What do I say?
“I feel terrible”?
“I feel anxious”?
I feel like an imposter most times

When others don’t look
My smile fades again
No reason to pretend any longer
When others don’t look
I can be me
“The tired me”
“The scared me”
“The confused me”
The me who longs to reach out
But does not know how!

On suffering

Apr28

Do we need to suffer to grow?
I think so
Do we want to suffer?
I think not!

Does suffering lead to growth?
It can
What does that depend on?
On us!

Where does that growth come from?
From change
Change in the way we see things
Change in the way we act

How does that change come to be?
From reflection
And a desire to grow

Can suffering break us?
I think it can
Does it have to?
I think not

Is life about suffering?
I don’t think so
Is it about growth?
I’d say yes

Does suffering lead to humility?
I think so
Is there a way around it?
I think not

Can suffering be our friend?
I think so
It depends on us
And how we respond

Am I at peace with the idea of suffering?
I think so
Will I look for it?
I think not!

Lida Berghuis
April 28th, 2012

To die and so to grow!

Oct22

To die to the self
To grow towards the beloved
To die
And therefore see with new eyes
To die
To let go of old habits and thoughts

To be born anew
Requires that we die
The egg needs to crack
For the chick to emerge
The seed needs to break
For the plant to grow high

Therefore, life is a series of deaths
Childhood dies and adulthood emerges
Our adult self dies
For the soul to be free
Death is never the end things
It’s only the path to the beginning of things

Death involves pain and suffering, of course
It’s hard to associate pain with growth
But once we’ve experienced a few beginnings, we
Can be assured of how things work

Lida Berghuis
October 2nd 2011

Dance!

May13

“Dance when you’’re broken open
Dance if you’’ve torn the bandage off
Dance in the middle of fighting
Dance when you’’re perfectly free!”*

Dance, dance your sorrow away
Dance and forget regret and loss
Dance a dance of thankfulness
Because your suffering is a guide

Dance when you have tears in your eyes
Dance and feel the weight lift off
Dance when you don’’t feel like it
Dancing will set you free

Music has power and sway
Music lifts us up
Music feeds our soul
Music the antidote

Dance in celebration
Dance in preparation
Dance at the beginning
Dance at the end

Change is a constant in life
Dance at each stage of life

Dance my friend, like dervishes do
Round and round, on and on…
Dance to commune with the angels above
Dance and listen to their song

Angels will sing the purest melody
Angels will be your guide
Listen to them carefully
What you’re looking for is not that far

Lida Berghuis
May 12th, 2010

*Rumi