Not just sadness

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It’s suffering, not just sadness

It’s like a suffocating weight on your chest

That you can’t lift no matter how hard you try

Others think it’s possible and that you’re not trying hard enough

There is no way you can explain to them how it feels

And that you’re trying your hardest

 

It’s suffering not just sadness

Sadness passes

Depression does not

It’s a guest that arrives

And refuses to leave

 

It’s suffering, not just sadness

The kind of suffering that makes you wonder

What it the point of being alive

It pushes you to the edge of the cliff

And you have to prevent the fall

 

It’s suffering, just not sadness

It’s hopelessness

You know this is not how you’re supposed to feel

It’s not normal

 

It’s suffering not just sadness

It’s not temporary

It lingers day after day

Tries your patience

Tests your beliefs

 

It’s suffering not just sadness

It’s a warm and humid room

With a small window

That you can’t open because it has rusted

 

The suffering ends eventually

Sadness leaves

Joy returns

And when it does 

You’ve learned not to take anything for granted in life 

 

July 26th, 2020

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